speaking of baseball and steroids

Here’s a nice piece from The Onion called:

“Barry Bonds Took Steroids, Reports Everyone Who Has Ever Watched Baseball”

It also contains one of the best Latour Litanies in Onion history. To wit,

“According to hundreds of thousands of reports coming out of every city in the U.S., Bonds’ steroid use has been widely reported and well-documented for years, with sports columnists, bloggers, people attending baseball games, memorabilia collectors, major ballpark popcorn and peanut vendors, groundskeepers, roommates, significant others, fathers-in-law, next-door neighbors, fellow fitness club members, bartenders, mailmen, coworkers, teachers, doormen, parking-lot attendants, fellow elevator passengers, Home Depot clerks, servicemen and women serving in Iraq, former baseball players, Congressmen, second-tier stand-up comics, Sports Illustrated’s Rick Reilly, and random passersby all having stated at some point in the last five years that Bonds was obviously taking some sort of performance-enhancing drugs.”